Christian Marriages Do Last

In January 2001, the Charisma News Service reported shocking news to many members of Assemblies of God churches: Ray Mossholder had announced his intention to divorce his wife of 42 years. The Mossholders’ popular parachurch organization—Marriage Plus Ministries—claimed to have saved 11,000 couples from getting a divorce over the past three decades and enjoyed endorsements from well-known religious leaders. Adultery, the article went on to say, was not an issue in Mossholder’s decision; he had simply decided he could no longer live with his wife, citing “irreconcilable differences” as the culprit. “I know I am violating my own teaching on divorce,” Mossholder told his supporters, but this was “a marriage that ultimately I could not live in.” Once the divorce was final, he intended to marry a “close friend” who was in the process of divorcing her own husband as well.¹

Tragic stories like this have sadly become more common. Skeptics gleefully cite the litany of Christian leaders whose broken marriages destroyed their ministries. More problematic still have been those divorced ministers who were not reproved, but rather confirmed in their continued leadership of the church. Sadly, some evangelical churches—the supposed defenders of an inerrant and authoritative Bible—have also gained something of a reputation for excusing divorce. Such irony leaves many outsiders scratching their heads.²

Matters seem even worse if one listens to naysayers who claim that divorce is at least as prevalent in evangelical churches as it is in the broader culture. Most popularly, critics cite a Barna Research study suggesting that 27% of evangelical Christians have divorced, whereas the figure is 24% for the American population at large.³ Barna also reports that Baptists divorce at a rate of 29% and non-denominational Protestants at 34%, while the number for those who profess no belief in God at all—atheists and agnostics—is only 21%.⁴ In addition, they say, America’s highest divorce rates seem to be in those areas where the Christian Church has its deepest roots: in the “Bible Belt.” Four of the top five states with the highest rate of divorce are: Tennessee, Arkansas, Alabama, and Oklahoma. New York, Connecticut, and Massachusetts, by contrast—the relatively un-churched Northeast—had much lower rates of divorce (due in part to higher rates of cohabitation).⁵

The good news, however, is that these numbers do not bear up under scrutiny. For example, one has to question Barna’s use of the designation “evangelical” and “born again” for his subjects when—according to Barna’s own polling—nearly a third of these same “professing Christians” believe that Jesus committed sins while on earth and nearly fifty percent consider Satan to be merely a symbolic, but not a real, living being.⁶ Thus, Barna’s evangelicals appear to be so in name only. Additionally, other more careful sociologists point out that when one adjusts the data for the higher teenage marriage rates⁷ in the Southern states mentioned, Christians do not seem worse off than their secular counterparts after all.⁸ Quite to the contrary, University of Chicago sociologist Andrew Greeley concluded in his 1991 study that committed Christians who pray regularly and value sexual intimacy have a much lower risk of actually getting a divorce.⁹ Similar studies add credence to Greeley’s research.¹⁰

In summary, two conclusions are clear. First, there can be no doubt marriage is under a massive assault in modern society. But secondly, and most importantly, good discipleship makes a tangible difference in people’s lives. Christians who are taught to honor and cherish matrimony do have happier and more stable marriages. Pastors should take heart in such news, for it confirms that their labors on behalf of the family actually do bear fruit. All of those sermons on sexual purity and marital fidelity are not in vain—despite what George Barna says.

Footnotes: